Be your own person.

Dear You,

“You’re Boring!”

Ever heard that one before? I know I have. From a time when I was very young, I heard that I was the boring child. I didn’t do, or want to do, anything exciting. For a while, I didn’t really care. But as we all know, words eventually take their toll.

I started trying new things, like skiing, snowboarding, wakeboarding and skating (the latter ended terribly). These things eventually led me to a different group of friends, who in turn led me to drinking and drugs and a lot of regrets. A lot of misery because of a childhood insult.

But, I turned it around. Well, I didn’t turn myself around, so much as God turned me around. Full 180, I was “boring” again. It was a weird time, still trying to be with the edgy crowd, while not being edgy. I felt like the stray barbeque sauce bottle among a sea of mayonnaise.

Now you may be wondering: Matt, why did you say all that? No, seriously, why?

Well, Faithful reader, I just want you to know that I know how much the words hurt. Sometimes they hurt so much, that you get that “Life Sucks and then you die” feeling. Which isn’t good or bad, it just is. It happens. There is nothing wrong with being a little down.

But you can’t stay down.

You (and by you I mean we) need to pick yourself up and show them that the words don’t mean anything anymore. You’ve heard them a million times and they were lies then and they are lies now. And yes, it will be hard, and it will hurt, and you will fail, and you will succeed. You just have to keep moving. You will stand out like a sore thumb. Own it. Make it you. Be “that guy”. Be “that girl”. What’s more boring than being what everyone else says you should be? The “blind leading the blind” comes to mind.

Be your own person. If you don’t know who you want to be, that’s okay too. Take your time, there is no rush to determine your own life. Once you take your stand as the “new you”, don’t think that you will be that way forever. People change, times change, styles change, trends change. Don’t be so worried about who you want to be, that you can’t be that person.

You need to know that who you want to be, can be who you are. But it takes blood, sweat and tears to get there. But never, ever sacrifice your health- physical, mental, or spiritual- to become someone. It will consume you.

If you want/need to cry, cry. Crying is good, and that’s coming from a guy who can count on his fingers the number of times he’s cried since he was 10.

I just want us all to see that who we are shouldn’t be dictated by others.

Learning and living with you,

Matthew Wheeler